Today the hits just kept on coming, and it was a hard day all around.
I wasn't anticipating that going to church was going to be hard, but sitting there without Will was awful. I missed him more during church than I think I have since he left. Seeing his buddies at the sacrament table, where he was until just a couple weeks ago, was hard. Of course, it didn't help that Dan was working and Audrey was in Logan, so there was only three of us going to church today. It also didn't help that today was the Primary program, so Olivia was on the stand, and it was just me and Duncan sitting together. It ALSO didn't help that it was Olivia's last ever Primary program, and my last chance ever to have a child in the Primary program.
And then, to top it all off, the Primary did a touching and sweet memorial to our friend Gideon. His 10 year old brother spoke about him, then his little sister came and held up a picture of him while the Primary kids sang his favorite song. His mom is in the Primary presidency, so she was right there with them too, and I can't begin to imagine how she held it together, but somehow she did. And THEN, I had to go and teach my Beehives a lesson on patience. Irony is a killer sometimes.
It hasn't gotten any better since we got home. I have had a headache all day. I'm ready for this day to be over. I just really missed him today. On Sundays, we always used to turn on Sounds for Sunday on the radio on the way to and from church, and Will and I always had a great time mocking the terrible, cheesy Mormon songs they would play. Now those cheesy songs come on and make me miss my boy.
Since life does keep happening, in spite of our blue mood, we got our pumpkins carved for Halloween tomorrow. I didn't want to very bad, but now that they are done, I'm glad we did it. They look great, and I carved a simplified version of a sugar skull in honor of Will and Mexico's Day of the Dead. Piper also has a sombrero and poncho to wear tomorrow night. Its the little things, right?
Now the wind is howling up a storm outside, my girlies are watching Hocus Pocus together, and I'm trying to talk Dan into dressing up as a leaf blower for work tomorrow. What? You wear a hat with a leaf attached to it by a string that hangs down in front of your face, and you blow it. How hard could that be?
Halloween almost as usual.